I had a shit week. I’m writing this in mid-May and, sitting here right now, I’m honestly amazed by how challenging things have been and how much has not gone as I’d hoped. The details aren’t really important since, of course, it hasn’t actually been the events that have been shitty, but rather my thoughts about them.
At times like this it’s easy to get caught up in thought work and it can be tempting, especially for those who are new to this work, to think that the answer to a shitty week must be to just change the way you’re thinking about it and – ABRACADABRA – you’ll feel better!
Life, however, isn’t about feeling good all the time. In fact, if you read last week’s blog, you know that we only create suffering for ourselves when we want things to be different than they are. So you want to feel better, but you actually feel worse because of the suffering you’ve created from the desire to feel differently than you do.
Oh, the irony!
The truth is that life comes with amazing weeks and it comes with shitty weeks. It’s part of our human existence. The desire to have it any other way only leads to further suffering.
That desire also robs us of being present in our lives. It shifts our focus away from what is happening right now to what should/might/could be different. Our brains get so caught up in trying to fix what is “wrong” and trying to make ourselves feel better that we experience our lives the way we experience a practiced drive. We remember the starting point and we know when we get to the destination, but there may be little to no memory of what happened along the way.
To combat this phenomenon, I like to participate in activities that force me remain mentally present. My favorite is horseback riding. It’s nearly impossible to be riding my horse effectively while replaying a difficult conversation in my brain or running through an overflowing to-do list. If I’m not paying attention when I’m riding, it’s not fair to my horse and one of us could get hurt.
The stakes don’t have to be that high for an activity to help redirect your thinking to the present moment. I’ve talked to friends and clients who accomplish this by creating art, actively listening to music, playing with their children, or participating in a formal meditation practice.
How you redirect your brain doesn’t matter. What matters is that when you do, you will notice that you experience diminished suffering. I ended my shitty week with an all-day horse show. My brain kept telling me that I shouldn’t go. I had too much to do. I knew if I spent the day riding, though, it would force me to let the rest go at least for a day.
I woke up this morning feeling physically tired from the long day but mentally refreshed as many of the toxic thought cycles in my brain had been disrupted. I took my mind off autopilot and made it focus on just being present. Now I can decide which of those thought cycles, if any, I want to pick back up again.
What do you do that helps you remain present in the moment? Do you prioritize that activity and make time for it in your life?
If you’d like help with this, I’d love to work with you. You can start by signing up for one of my free offerings found below, or you can email me directly at hello@unicorndoctor.com.
Free Mini Course:
How To Feel Better On Your Next Shift
(geared toward emergency medicine professionals, but the lessons apply universally)
Free Printable Guide:
7 Steps For Getting Your Priorities Straight
(a straightforward process to help your calendar align with your priorities in life)
